Updated: Oct 9, 2020
With everything going on in life, it's easy to feel powerless. We have chaotic households, hectic schedules, to-do lists a mile long, and more daily emails than we can count. That was me prior to making a conscious effort to change all that, minus the chaotic household (I was solo).
I remember when I made my boss move and started my web design business. I started out in survival mode—no cash and no clients, so I had to do something fast to conjure up some business. My brilliant plan: I offered web design for $99. As you can imagine, the flood gates opened. I was taking on more projects than any solo human should've been able to handle. Although I got through 4 months of juggling consultations, projects, clients, calls, emails, and everything else that comes with running a business, I felt depleted and deprived!!
I was attracting too many clients who wanted more without paying more and it left me doing work that I didn't feel passionate about. I knew my design work added more value to those clients than I was getting paid for. I wasn't charging what I was worth. After those first few months I decided to make some changes.
Initially, I was afraid to raise my rates. My thought was if I raise my rates, I'll make less money, and less money means struggling to pay rent. I was at a fork in the road. A decision had to be made and I had to be willing to take a risk on myself.
I had to trust myself.
I had to trust GOD (the Universe, Source, Spirit).
I had to believe that everything always works out PERFECTLY for me.
So, I did it. I raised my rates and the unexpected happened. I attracted more clients. So I raised my rates again, and again, and again. I ended up making more money with a fraction of the clients that I needed when I was selling my time for $99 and now I could choose who I WANTED to work with.
The whole purpose of starting my own business was to earn a living doing something I enjoyed doing. I got to a place where I valued my work and my time so much that I implemented a few guidelines and made a commitment to myself.
No longer would I take on work below a certain dollar amount, no longer would I discount my services, no longer would I work past 6 pm (eventually 6 pm became 4 pm), and no longer would I take on more than 3 big projects at one time. In addition to my new set of rules, I made a new commitment: I would no longer say yes, when I meant no.
Saying "no" changed my life.
This commitment would become the start of my self-love journey.
Seems like a contradiction to my mantra, "Let's get in hell yes! mode"? Not at all. I was saying "hell yes!" to myself and to the projects that fit my design style and clients that fit my work style. If it wasn't a hell yes! I said no.
The shift that happened was beautiful. I learned how to value myself and trust that everything would work out when I was inspired to choose one thing over another—a HUGE lesson. Life was more peaceful, my days were less stressful, I had more time to do the things I enjoyed, and I crushed the belief that you have to "work extra hard (sweat) and work more (pass out)" to be successful.
Hell Yes Mode
Life is full of things to do, experience, and create. Having so much variety and so many choices is the spice of life, but it's waayyy too easy to get sidetracked and lose focus. When you're juggling too many tasks or ideas, you ultimately delay completion and manifestation of the thing you most want.
To align yourself with what you're trying to manifest, you have to FEEL what fits and what doesn't.
Entrepreneur Derek Sivers, back in 2009, introduced the concept of the Hell Yeah to the world. He believed that changing the way you said yes could lead to better decision making. He said “No more yes. It’s either hell yeah or no.” And some time later, Mark Manson followed up with a very nearly nasty post and commentary titled "Fuck Yes or No", which was focused mainly on relationships and dating. He called it The Law of Fuck Yes or No and the law says that when you want to get involved with someone new, they must INSPIRE you to say "fuck yes" in order for you to proceed with them.
I’m applying this concept or law, whatever you want to call it, to my WHOLE life.
If it doesn’t excite me and make me feel like it’s going to get me closer to fulfilling my purpose and living the life I want to live, I say no.
Hell yes! mode is when you unequivocally say yes to the things that matter most to you. The things that align with your heart, passions, and purpose. It's when you KNOW something is meant for you and you're willing to let go of the things that don't make your heart pump a little faster to align yourself with those that do.
Your YES should be emotionally empowered and abundantly charged. New opportunities that flow to you should excite you. Hell yes! feels passionate. Hell yes! feels certain. Hell yes! feels like clarity.
You should feel worthy of receiving your yes.
You should find comfort in change as you move forward to your yes.
Your yes should take you to the next step, next level, or next phase.
When you're highly inspired to do something, say a BIG fat hell yes!
If it's not a hell yes, say no and move on. Act on inspiration and insight, and always trust your inner guidance. Trust that the right opportunity will come along because you made room for it and your yes will be delivered to you by our big, beautiful Universe.
What habit have you implemented that made a huge difference in the way you move around in life? I'd love to hear about it. Share as much detail as you can in the comments. You can't share any links to other websites, posts or articles, but others can benefit from your story. Your voice is so powerful that it can encourage change in others.
Cheers to hell yes!
Wanauma Graham is a creative and lifestyle entrepreneur, author of "Totally Unstoppable", and creator of BossFreeMedia.com. She's dedicated to helping women work through fear and do something they’ve always wanted to do.