Updated: Oct 9, 2020
I wrote a Facebook post this past week in response to a woman who was feeling heartbroken because her boyfriend had broken up with her. Something I'm sure we can all relate to: the ending of a relationship and the resulting heartbreak.
But, I'm not writing about heartbreak today, I'm writing about endings and the hidden blessing behind them. Sounds crazy, I know. You're probably wondering: how can a painful ending be a blessing when it feels more like a relentless setback!?
I get it. Endings (I call them Tower Moments) are painful and that pain can make us THINK we're completely debilitated. I'm talking about the whole can't get out of bed or off the sofa all day funk.
We focus so much on the pain we feel that it engulfs us in a whirlwind of negative thoughts, why's, what-ifs, and blame. One leading on to the next. And before we know it, we're stuck in a self-perpetuating cycle of negativity.
I'd like to shift gears though and look at the other side of that, because there is no leveling up without contrast.
EVERYTHING in life has contrast.
Where there is negative there is also positive. So, let's look at the positive aspects.
Most times when something is removed from your life, it's a hidden blessing. Yes, a blessing.
Let me explain...
That ending is opening up and making space for a new opportunity, fresh start, greater love, better position, or new idea. It sets you free to expand yourself if you've been holding yourself back in ANY way.
The truth is: a job, a location, a circumstance, or a relationship can hold us back from becoming who we were MADE to be. That is why we sometimes feel stifled, stagnant, and stuck, and in most cases we're not understanding why.
That's where a Tower Moment serves it's purpose. I talk about this in my book Totally Unstoppable so I recommend it if you're feeling stuck or debilitated from a set-back.
A Tower Moment happens when it's time for you to make a move and clear out what no longer fits in your life.
Maybe deep down you've known you needed to make a change or release something, but you chose to continue to hang on to something that no longer felt right for you.
When you hold on tightly to things that no longer support your growth, the Universe will step in to clear space for you to...
See something that you've been missing
Do something that you've been avoiding
Get you headed in the direction of fulfilling your destiny
That's divine intervention at play.
The people and opportunities we come face-to-face with in life are not always meant to stick around for the long-term. They serve a purpose—one that is divinely orchestrated or predestined—and provide what we need for the moment, whether that's a minute, a day. a year. or a decade. Rarely is it a lifetime.
This perspective makes it easier to let go, with love, and take steps in a new direction. Maybe one that you hadn't even considered.
If you're experiencing a heartbreak, ill health, job loss, or the end of a friendship, I bet a year from now you'll look back and say, wow that was a blessing, and thank the Universe for it. It will have shaped you, taught you, strengthened you, stretched you, or moved you a step further in your journey.
I empathize with your pain and know it will suck before it gets better, but it WILL get better. Take the opportunity that comes from it. It is a blessing; a gift to you.
You've been released and set free.
Go be TOTALLY UNSTOPPABLE and keep journeying towards your Mount Everest!!
And if this is not you and all is well in your world, pass it along. Help someone else get unstuck today.
Until next time,
Wanauma Graham is a creative and lifestyle entrepreneur, author of "Totally Unstoppable", and creator of BossFreeMedia.com. She's dedicated to helping women work through fear and do something they’ve always wanted to do.